"A Vaisnava householder should always live according to the prescribed
duties; graciously hosting guests to their full satisfaction. His
spiritual discipline will not be impaired by his living or
associating with his wife. Nor is it forbidden for him to use mustard
oil or other perfumed oil. Foods like milk, curd, etc., which are
considered by ritualistic brahmanas to be inedible and non-vegetarian,
become wholesome vegetarian food for the yukta-vairagi.
"He is always attentive in chanting the holy name free from the ten
offenses. He accepts everything favourable for the execution of
devotional service and carefully rejects things that are unfavourable.
His spiritual success and excellence grow by cultivating undeviating
faith in the holy name. A Vaisnava of this stature becomes illustrious
in his householder life. He strictly avoids fault-finding and
analysing others behaviour. He is compassionately disposed to all
living entities and is dedicated to act for their benefit, always free
from envy.
Prema-vivarta, "Chapter 17 - The Standards Of Vaisnava Etiquette
Reflects The Class of a Devotee"
Comments
@Shruti,
Fault finding in others can be overcome by blessing of other devotees who do not find faults in others. It worked for me for sure.